Durres, coffee shops, ego

Dear friends and family,

I made it to Durres,which is on the coast again. This is a very modern feeling city, with many high rises and a promenade along the waterfront that goes for miles.

There are many hotels and cafes that line this waterfront promenade. It seems like about one fourth of the businesses are coffee cafes. Some advertise “Tabacchino” which I think means that you can smoke inside, and looking through the window confirms that part.

Ninety percent of the coffee drinkers are men. It seems funny to me after hearing how men (in the US?) have few friends, especially in older life and then see these men sitting for hours discussing something that seems important. In small towns I saw almost NO women sitting out,here in the more modern larger city there are women, but about one tenth of the number of men. I don’t see much sign of it being Muslim here so I assume that the Muslim women are in the homes (and was told that by guys in Shkoder as well). 

When I remarked in Montenegro about all the men sitting for hours over cups of coffee I was treated to several Serbian language jokes about how men don’t work and sit and drink coffee all day while their wives were working. It looks to be similar here, but just by appearances so far.

Even though it appears very modern, I was warned by my apartment landlord to never drink the water anywhere in Albania, but only bottled water. Also, the sewage system cannot handle toilet paper so it needs to go in the bin instead of flushing. Some infrastructure work needed.

Hotels are fairly expensive since this is a beach resort, often over $100 USD per night. I am staying in a high rise apartment for $35 per night with a view of the sea. It has two large bedrooms, a full kitchen and two full baths. Oddly, they don’t use shower curtains here and the water goes everywhere. I would guess that there are a lot of leaks to lower floors, but just guessing. Now, deeper into the country everyone wants cash payments in lek currency, so I have to visit the ATM to keep stocked up.

The food here is so fresh and tasty, especially the fruits and vegetables. I was told that it has to do with the climate and soil. Still, there is no veg and fruit section in groceries, still outside in beautiful displays. The cost of food is dirt cheap unless specialty food that probably is imported. 

Restaurant food is also inexpensive and good. The local dishes seem to be a mix of what I would have thought Greek food to be, with yogurt in the cooking and lots of Italian food as well. The salads and grilled vegetables have amazing tastes and are readily and inexpensively available. I am not a fan of any of their baked goods, and often peruse the offerings in the many bakeries I walk by. Usually I come out empty handed as nothing tempts me. Maybe starting this trip with six weeks in France has something to do with that!

Driving and traffic: I was told that the Albanians are “crazy drivers”. Now I know what that means. Picture this (this is what it looks like) : you give a whole country drivers licenses with no training, take away all signs and driving rules, remove all street lines and parking lines and tell everyone to enjoy themselves and you get something close to what I see daily. You can parallel park, face in at an angle, or face straight in. You can stop in the middle of the street to run in and buy something and you can drive backwards instead of trying to turn around. You can choose which side of the street to drive on, or alternate sides for fun. Yes, the crosswalks are strictly obeyed, but you have to actually step out and start your crossing and they WILL stop (so far, as I am alive to write this). When I pedal through cities I have to be defensive and aggressive. I am not afraid to ride on the sidewalks amongst the walkers to protect myself. Although, yesterday a car surprised me from behind as I rode the sidewalk. 

Yesterday as I sat in the window of a cafe for lunch, I heard a knock on the window and saw Chris, the young man from the hostel in Shkoder, saying hello. We had lunch together and caught up. Small world for sure. He was here for the week to volunteer at the dog shelter in exchange for room and board. I never thought of those options when I travelled in my twenties and wonder if they even existed then. 

Today’s thoughts while riding were about fate. I find when bike touring that I have more acceptance and even can endure what happens. I notice if a waiter or desk clerk says something like ” don’t worry, it won’t take too long” I usually answer with ” No problem, I do things slowly and have learned patience as a bike tourer”. 

Last year while touring in Colombia I would usually ride from 0530 to about 1000, then arrive at my hotel to find that check in time wasn’t available until 2 or 3 PM. I would chill out in the lobby and read or write till then and not mind it much. 

So, with this practice, I am getting better at accepting fate that happens, but what Neitzshe suggests is ” not only bear what is necessary, still less conceal it…but love it.”

That’s still a big step for me, to go from accepting and enduring my fate to loving it. Hmm, long ride coming up today to spend more time thinking about loving it.

A day later:

I did think about this on yesterday’s five hour ride. Lately, now that I’m in better shape physically, I’ve been noticing my physicalness in a positive way and embracing the fact that I can endure a lot at this point in my life. 

But, I notice the extra weight of this I carry with me. I’ll call it ego for now. I hold tight to that ” tough guy” image as it helps me distance myself from the ” not adequate enough” self image that I have carefully cultivated since childhood. Just when I start to feel ” enough” I realize it’s all ego. Maybe I can enjoy the ego enhancing thoughts ( of self)for awhile before I become aware of it and by this awareness have to give it up. Damn, I would have enjoyed being all pumped up with self!

I had another experience yesterday to share: I was in a tiny town away from the coast. I went out for lunch and noticed all the restaurants closed- either for the season or just the afternoon, I wasn’t sure. I passed two tiny older ladies wearing aprons and babushkas sitting outside a tiny room with four tables. I asked if they served food and they didn’t understand my English. 

I pulled out my phone and typed my eating question into Google translate and showed it to one of them. She glanced at the phone quickly as I realized she didn’t seem to be able to read. I felt like I was embarrassing her so put the phone away.

One walked inside and waved me to follow, which I did. She sat me at a table and disappeared in back. I poked my nose around the corner and pretended to hold a menu. She turned, ignored me, and walked away. Soon she appeared with a big bowl of soup with chunks of beef. She set it in front of me and asked “Rizotto?” and I nodded.

When she brought out the rice she demonstrated that I should put the rice into the soup, which I did. Both women watched me eat, I guess to make sure I liked it, or just out of curiosity. It was tasty.

I finished up and took out some lek showing I was ready to pay. One woman found a pen and paper and wrote the number 600, which I paid ($6).

This is why I travel, for these experiences. 

Sending love,

Charley