Finally leaving Shkoder and learning of others’ challenges

Dear friends and family,

Well, I finally broke free of the “Hotel California” effect of the group staying at the hostel in Shkoder. I added one more day to the stay I had scheduled when I wrote my last post to seven days overall. I got to see the first day of their Karneval, which was the kid’s day to perform folk songs on the main square.

There were tears shed with my leaving. Mostly mine, but another as well. I remember groups congealing like this from my stops last winter in Colombia but even more so when I was out sailing in my thirties. A group of sailors would meet somewhere, tell their stories and discuss lives and goals and dreams forming a close bond because we can go deep in our discussions and then sail away, either to meet at the next port or never see each other again. In those days with no email or similar technology, it was harder to stay in touch. Now we can stay in touch easily if we choose. Even if, it was still hard to leave after being part of this international family. For me, being the eldest, I was delighted to be taken in by that “family”and hopefully offer some life wisdom to the younger members. A role I am careful of. Imagine, I get to do some good while having the time of my life. 

When I bicycle through a country I want to see the historical sites and the natural beauty, but what I mostly seek is to understand the people and how they live and how they manage their lives and dreams and goals. I try not to share too much history or tourist site info as you can see that on the internet. 

So, the international discussions at the hostel and with other people I met were about politics, social issues and economic issues.

In Albania, as recently as 1997, there was an investment scheme that sucked in one third of the populace into investing their life savings with expected returns as high as 30%. Of course it was a Ponzi scheme and the perpetrators declared bankruptcy and left the country in shambles. Immediately over a million weapons were stolen from the government as people tried to protect their homes and families. One local called it a “civil war” as she was in grade school when guys with guns came to her school to kidnap her classmates. Others told me that it wasn’t that bad, so I guess it depends on individual experiences.

The country is still rebuilding after that economic failure, which came shortly after the fall of communism here, so kind of the double whammy very recently. 

Effects of that history is that the country is behind most of Europe in development. It has the lowest economy per capita of Europe. It seems a bit behind on other issues as well.

The recent record of human rights and women’s rights is not great. Talking to a young man at the hostel, that makes it difficult to date here.If a woman is seen out on a date with more than one man, the gossip starts and she has a reputation problem. He mentioned that a get-around is to have her come on a date with you and bring her girlfriends so people that see this do not know who is dating who, so minimized the problem. Tough to navigate though it seems. There are still a lot of arranged marriages. 

Also, all the locals feel that there is major corruption here at all levels, instead of just at the highest levels, like in the US. If you call the police, often the people with the most money are the ones protected. If you go to the doctor or hospital you are expected to pay some cash with your visit or you simply will not be seen. So, a national health care system, but corrupt. 

I saw a mix of hope and cynicism amongst the young people. Most do think that things are getting better and will continue. I felt that the country is on the upswing from these discussions. 

We talked a lot about the US political situation and I found that the Europeans are VERY informed as to what the US is doing. They take seriously things like the issue of the US buying Greenland, the possibility of Canada being the 51st state and even the conversion of Gaza to a Trump resort. I think of those as ridiculous, but maybe I should be more serious.

I mentioned to them that maybe I should stay in Albania to get away from the trauma in the US and was told that what the US does affects the whole world and there is no way I can be immune from these actions. Wow. 

They told me that in school cheating is usual. Sometimes the teachers put the smart kids in the front, separated from the other students so the others cannot copy from them. Locals here knew of people who never studied or took tests that bought degrees and are practicing professionally with those purchased degrees, including a doctor! I had a tooth crown fall off and was considering getting it reglued here, but now reconsidering. 

I happened across a couple of young and tall and athletic black professional volleyball players from the US, playing on an Albanian team. We had a long talk together in a coffee shop and they told me how often they get racial slurs against them and get pointed at in public often. We went into the US changes under this administration affecting DEI, the women’s movement, wokeism, and then the new acceptance of public racism in the US. They are considering staying out of the US for the duration of this president to protect themselves, as putting up with the issues in Albania might be easier than in the US. That’s what they have to consider as they plan their future. 

An aside: one woman was from Cleveland, only about ten miles from where I grew up. I never had this kind of frank discussion with a black woman there, guess I have to be outside the US to have this.

I think about the difference in my life. Being a middle class, educated white male I never had to think about discrimination. I was so privileged and sometimes like to think that I “pulled myself up by my own bootstraps” (or at least some version of that) when the truth is that with my privelege it was so easy to be successful in my career without those other challenges. I didn’t have to be especially clever or smart, just get out of bed and go to work without huge constraints and reap the rewards. I had a government that worked and could be trusted.

Today I had an incident: I stopped my bike across the street from a man with a portable tent selling used motor oil and old hubcaps. I took out my phone/camera to take a snap and he spotted me and came running across the street aggressively attempting to snatch my phone from me. I wasn’t about to let that happen so pulled myself up to my full two meters in height and met his energy head on. When he got close, he realized that he was outmatched by my size and resistance and immediately stopped. He then changed tacks and tried asking for me to delete any pictures I took from my phone. I understood his dilemma, he was probably operating illegally and didn’t want evidence, so I showed him on my phone that I did not have any pictures of him.

This reminded me of when I was in my five year sailing years (In he 80’s) that we (former wife Nancy and I) would hear a boat approach to anchor near us and then have to worry that they were going to anchor too close and drag down on us in the middle of the night. She would say “go up top and look mean” to scare them away. I would pop my head up top, but those of you that know me can guess how effective me looking mean worked. 

Today with the illegal oil guy it seemed to work. Maybe with all those thousand of failures I should have tried what I did today, or maybe just be kind like my normal practice and normal success. Everyone else in Albania so far has been very friendly and curious to talk to this American. 

I do recognize that the opinions of what is happening here in Albania is only from a few sources, but it is their truth and what they deal with in daily life. 

Enough for today.

Sending kindness and love today,

Charley